Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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