There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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