office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
