did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
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