Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
