Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize