New low: just hacked my moms facebook
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
someone owes me an orgasm
you win again, gameday.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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