i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
