you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
My vagina is officially offended.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
