Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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