somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
