We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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