I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
