Me. At least after what I've been through.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
