Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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