the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
