white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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