quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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