Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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