Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
