this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize