dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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