I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
