Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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