Your dad touched me again.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
