You don't have asthma, your pregnant
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize