ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
