Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
