i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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