Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
