Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize