nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize