he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
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Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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