Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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