I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
