where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
OPIZZABONMYDICK
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Text me some of your sweat
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
