Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
