just come out here and I will go home with you...
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
