swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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