Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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