its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Just puked most of my soul out..
the raccoons are back...
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