He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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