Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize