I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
