Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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