yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
