Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?