I'm gonna have a badass scar
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
It's just like the Real World with babies
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
