we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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