Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
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