Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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